Too disturbing to send?

It has been brought to my attention, very politely, that a card I sent was too disturbing and upset the recipient and even more so their children.

It was sold by Royal Mail and is an image of one of their stamps from the Classic Science Fiction range. It shows a depiction of Frankensteins Monster from the novel Frankenstein by Mary Shelley.

It wasn’t my intention to upset anybody but maybe I shouldn’t have sent it. What are your thoughts?


I would have loved such a card! In general I spare the “darker cards” for people either mentioning them in their profile or liking cards in that style.

Conclusion: not too disturbing to send, but not suited for everybody (esp. small kids).


If the recipient already found it disturbing, why show it to the children :thinking:

But maybe if they say in the profile they don’t like anything scary, I would not send it, otherwise it’s just a postage stamp image. (If it’s the one I think, from a small picture it looked like the eyes were carved out, but closer look I think it looks lovely someway.)

I would answer I’m sorry, perhaps offer to send a not disturbing card, if they say it’s children’s profile or they are easily disturbed. But if not, then tell I’m sorry. If it’s adult profile, maybe they just didn’t like the card and are after another card :laughing:


I’d love to get such a card too, without mentioning it in my profile that I like dark stories.

I think it happens eventually that you unintentionally upset someone with a card. You meant well…

I’d also suggest to send cards that aren’t “mainstream” taste only to those asking for such cards in their profiles. Of course it isn’t easy to define what isn’t “mainstream” - I’d say: scary, weird or sarcastic, erotic, political and religious motifs.

Edit : did they write in their profile that cards should be child - friendly? Some users do. If not, I’d politely suggest it and offer to send a happy card. :wink:


@Cassisia If this is about his last sent card, the lady has only this on her profile:

"Please, don’t send me :

  • religion cards
  • dog and cat"

Nothing about anything else. So Frankenstein stamp card isn’t anything from above so I don’t understand this reaction, no one isn’t clairvoyant and don’t know if there are children at homes or so :thinking: Especially when there are no info on the profile about family etc.
P.S. To be honest this card scares me a bit and it looks like dead body for me :sweat_smile: :face_with_open_eyes_and_hand_over_mouth: Maybe this is only because the recent events and brings such an association right now. And I knew different Frankie so far


I also thought it can look like a dead person’s head, with after death blood setting areas, or a head, looking at the moon, light from a fire reflecting to her face.

I saw that postcard in your wall. Well, personally I would not like it, but only because I don’t like the illustration. I don’t think that image is disturbing.
I also saw the profile of the person you sent it.
She has a huge list of things she likes (I don’t like people who write such long lists!) but she doesn’t mention the fact that she has children.
Many people say that they have children and they want postcards that could be shown to them and I respect that. But she didn’t do that.
So, in my humble opinion, you didn’t do wrong.
Go on, you can’t make everyone happy. :blush:


I couldn’t have put it better! So with all due respect, it’s not a very pleasant card, especially in the light of the last days. I wouldn’t send it to anyone unless someone says on the profile that he loves spooky things. Nevertheless, I think the reaction was a bit exaggerated (although at the same time she is not surprised me either, maybe she is a very emotional person) and you shouldn’t worry about it, you didn’t do anything against her profile.


If the Royal Mail thinks it’s an acceptable image for a stamp, I wouldn’t worry too much about it, unless of course they said nothing scary in the profile.


You’ve done nothing wrong. On the contrary, she likes reading and stamps. You’ve sent her a combination of the 2. A stamp postcard of a classic novel. I would be very pleased with your effort to find me something suitable. She does not mention among her many wishes to receive child-friendly cards. Maybe that should be her priority then.

EDIT: you’ve actually scored a natural hat-trick! I’d overlooked the part where she also states she likes Halloween cards, so that’s 3 in a row!


I’m not saying they’re not allowed to feel disturbed, they can feel any way despite what’s in their profile. But they said they liked stamps and wished for Halloween cards, yet didn’t mention they would not like a “scary” card etc. So you did nothing wrong.

I personally leave any card that might offed the receipent and I’m not sure if they would like it, I leave it to someone who I’m 90% sure will like it. Like for a tag card I was going to send a card thaat I thought they would like but noticed the card had some nudity (picture of a beach) and the recipent was from USA. So I decided to send another card just in case the slight nudity would be an issue.

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From the profile I can’t see that your card wouldn’t fit.
I wouldn’t send this card if there’s something mentioned like the person doesn’t like halloween or scary things or that the cards should be child-friendly.


Out of curiosity I had to look that postcard up. It’s a bit scary but not that much.
Honestly, it’s a tribute to the literary work of a woman who wrote a piece of art during a time when the majority of women in literature were not necessarily praised for their writings.
Frankenstein is a classic. I find it great that Royal Mail reminds us of these people.

But even here I have come across helicopter and lawn-mower parents that find the Grimm tales too violent. :woman_facepalming: Mind you: The Grimm tales are the more child-friendly version. But it seems that this kind of attitude is trendy among the woke mentalists.


I looked at the image. I think it is fine. Not scary at all, in my opinion. Besides, the woman says she likes Halloween. So if she doesn’t like scary images – and this image is not scary – then she shouldn’t mention Halloween. And why show it to her children if she thought it was frightening? The way I look at it is this: there are over 800,000 members on this site; you’re not going to please them all. Do your best. Beyond that, you have no control.


I personally love that series of stamps and postcards and yes- the Royal Mail is not going to issue anything too controversial so I think you were grand to send it!!


The picture have the words, “Frankenstein, Mary Shelley” written on it. I would advice the recipient to check out the work of Frankenstein and explain about the stamp. They are issued by Royal Mail to celebrate an ocassion. Perhaps, the picture look scary but there is information behind the image. If they know about the image background, maybe they won’t find the picture scary.


I think a postcard modelled after a country’s own stamp is pretty mainstream.


She said she likes Halloween, stamps, and reading. I think the average person would assume that this particular card would be of interest to her. At least I would think it was a perfect fit!

I don’t say I like spooky things on my profile but that doesn’t mean I don’t like spooky things. It’s impossible to write everything there. I would be happy to receive cards for all kinds of themes that I didn’t mention.


Re: Royal Mail

I have in my profile: please nothing Covid-themed

It is not your fault. The addressee does mainly list her wishes without telling very much about herself nor telling about her family, so how could you know this card would disturb anybody!