Hard to Please?

That can be hard when there doesn’t seem to be anything in common with their profile. When that happens to me, I write about the weather, or about my city/region. Or I ask them questions, if I can think of some related to their topic(s) of interest.


I have sent blank cards in an envelope to the two who wanted them. Neither of them is registered.


Yes, but also sometimes AD company cards or free gallery cards. I often find so cool ad cards. Some cards which are Most often favorited at my send wall are ad cards.


And sometimes such cards are even liked by people, who state “no ad cards please” on their profile.


What I write? Something nice or about my plans. Or if the profile really troubles me, I write the address and ID, put it aside for a day and write it them. Some distance often help.


Exactly :smiley:


I discoverd a new strategy for myself. I send a card to demanding profiles and tell them in the text that their profile is not d’accord with the PC guidelines. Sometimes people really did not read the guidlines and than they actually change something. And Sometimes they just register the card without a thank you.


I try to remove them from my mind and treat it more like writing to myself with one of the things they like as a prompt. For example, if their request list included birds, I’d say something like:

I like birds too — around here we see X X and X. My favourites are…

And, if all they list are card brands, I’ll tell them about my collections:

I also collect postcards — my collection is based around themes, mostly temples, cats, and postboxes! Do you also like special postmarks? I love requesting them and (im)patiently waiting for them to be sent back to me! It’s always so exciting when they arrive!


I see you collect postcards! I collect X. I got into it because X and my favourite is Y.

Of course, it’s not always easy to want to write a nice message to someone with a profile like that, but I don’t want them to rob me of the joy of writing a postcard so I usually pick a card, address it, and then walk away and come back to it once I’ve had some time to separate myself from their profile and write something I’ll enjoy writing (without re-reading their profile in detail :face_with_symbols_over_mouth:).


Honestly I would just be like : “Hello, hope you’re doing fine and happy postcrossing !” lol :joy: Those kind of profiles are bothering enough…


I’d read this as saying they prefer tourist photo cards showing cities, nature, animals, bridges, trains, boats, cars, monuments etc which is at least 50% of postcards sold in shops


I got a profile this morning from a stamp collector, who wanted me to put my written card in a stamped envelope to send so that she wouldn’t have to cut up the card to get at the stamp for her collection. I thought about it for a while. I also collect stamps, but for me, Postcrossing is about spreading good will, card by card, not about collecting.

So how did I solve my little problem? I sent this person a card that’s meant to be cut up, so that they won’t have any guilt about destroying the card in order to collect the stamp.


That moose is funny!
One nice thing about US mail is a card going overseas costs the same to mail as an envelope. I can put a bunch of large size or lower value stamps on the envelope that dont really fit on cards (I used to have a monthly stamp subscription and got too many 3 and 4 cent stamps). I often put a penny stamp on the card itself just to help make it look more complete


I think that comment was regarding the international rate.


But what difference does it make, why a person wants a card in an envelope - is it because he is a stamp collector or because it is safer for the card or because it is safer for the recipient? Why can’t you send a card in an envelope, but make a problem out of this request?


It makes a difference to me, for the reasons I stated in my post. If there had been a safety reason, of course I would have used an envelope.

Thank you for helping me to think through this a little more.


We try to find something that will fit in with things on profile but if there are too many negatives we would probably send anything that we have and wouldn’t send to anyone else. :joy::rofl:.

For us it is finding out more about the world and people in it. We enjoy finding a card on in the letter box and finding out more about where it was sent from.

On a recent profile I loved the sentiment - It’s more about you than me (not exact words)


I would have thought they like to keep the card with message in any case :smile:
but for me it’s easy to use envelope, what ever reason, as the cost is the same. And if I can help someone with their stamp collection in addition to normal postcrossing connection card, why not. Of course it’s everyone’s own choice :+1:

To my own hard to please feeling -moment:
the member wrote they are stamp collector, this and this collector, and I have nothing such. I felt what ever I send, it’s not good. So I write another card and then this.

The second time I read this profile, I notice they don’t in any ways even ask I should help them with their collection. They only share their hobby!
Same as I tell I like ice skating, reading, tea…I don’t expect anyone send me skate-laces, books or tea! So, interesting, did/do I only assume, if someone is (stamp) collector, that they want something from me? They can mention it for other collectors to know, if one be interested to swap with them. I felt like a small enlightning moment for me :smile:

The fun thing is, had I written the card at once, I would have thought “hard to please”, but when I wrote another and wrote this later, it didn’t feel like it anymore. Maybe they would have actually liked something related to their collection, but it really didn’t even hint so when I read it again.


@zagraham is not making a problem; the topic of this forum post is ‘Hard to Please’. Members come here to safely share their thoughts and feelings about what they experience as hard to please requests.
Postcrossing is about sending postcards (and connecting via those postcards, not stamp collecting). By definition postcards are mailed without envelopes.

I understand that for a very small percentage of members, it is “safer” for the postcard to be in an envelope, and generally those members will clearly state this in their profile. I’m confident all compassionate members use an envelope when it’s requested for safety reasons.


Indeed. I was trying to solve a personal philosophical problem that I’d had, which actually had little to do with the individual I was sending a card to. And since I had recently read this post, I thought I’d share my thoughts about it here.

That’s all.

Editing to add: When I’m choosing a card to send, I try to think about what would give me pleasure to receive. I look at the individual’s profile, too, and if I have a card that dovetails with their interests, I sometimes will send that.

1 Like