Why do people quit postcrossing? :(

Hi all!

The question is why people do quit postcrossing movement?


Situation happened and I am upset now :frowning:

I used to swap with one of users for a few times. We had warmful communication. Lately I sent her the next postcard made by my desing as a surprise but she gave no answer. Actually she doesn’t read my messages almost 3 weeks…

Today I saw in conversation her nickname as anonXXXXXXXX :frowning:

And her official page says:
This member is no longer participating in Postcrossing.

So it means she quit by unregistering her account…

I wonder why?
I feel some emptiness now…


What’s your thoughts?

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I wouldn’t take it personally - lots of things happen in people’s lives eh? And yes, it’s hard when we lose a friend on Postcrossing.

They could have just gotten busy, gotten a new job, gotten sick, have to take care of someone in their family, can’t afford to send cards anymore, might have had to move suddenly because of floods, fire or war - there are many, many possible reasons.

And lots of us take breaks sometimes for months or years & come back, so you just never know - they might come back. :purple_heart:

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Yes, this has happened to me also, not sure what is going on with a member I had a connection with,
but no answer to my messages. But she is still active at least. So I can hope and wish her the best.
but I agree it is a bit disheartening, not knowing.

And there are others that just stopped communicating… but changes in our lives happen
and we must continue on. So sorry this has happened for you…

9 Likes

There are a variety of reasons why this happens. Work, school, upheavals in their life, illnesses, boredom, etc. In a few cases, they have left the hobby. Sometimes I would look at my wall at my received cards and the ones I have sent. A fair number have “Account Closed” over them.

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Also expensive postages rates affect. When a stamp alone cost around 2 euros or more, that is a lot when other costs are also on the rise.

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They lost interest.
They cannot longer afford.
They move into a country or maybe just a town where it is very hard to go on with Postcrossing.
They no longer have the time they had before.
They got seriously ill and therefore they can’t or they won’t continue with Postcrossing.
They die.

It seems you take this a bit too personal but you see there are uncountable reasons why someone quit Postcrossing. I wouldn’t think too much about the possibly reason. Usually you’ll never find out anyway.

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There could be various reasons why someone decides to leave Postcrossing. It could be personal reasons, a change in interests or priorities, or even just a temporary break. While it’s difficult not to take it personally, it’s important to remember that people’s circumstances and choices can change.

It’s completely normal to feel a sense of emptiness when a connection you valued comes to an end. However, Postcrossing is a vibrant community, and there are many other members out there who are passionate about exchanging postcards and creating connections. I encourage you to continue exploring the platform and reaching out to new people. Remember, each postcard you send and receive is an opportunity to make someone’s day a little brighter, even if not every connection lasts forever. Keep spreading joy through your postcards, and I’m sure you’ll encounter many more fulfilling exchanges in the future.

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Really sorry for you losing a friend on postcrossing,
I have faced this, i had one friend on other platform and we were like penpals but she got busy in her life she stopped sending me mails, but with her agreement i keep sending her greetings card occasionally:)
And in other case, one friend got away from Snailmailing for few month due to family reason, and got back after some time, it made me sp happy welcoming her back:)

And i would be so sad it any of my friends/pals would close their account or leave this hobby:(

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I can understand that you feel empty and confused, you form a connection with someone and when it suddenly stops without communication, it can feel hard. There can be so many reasons why someone stops, and often related to their own life, things can get in between which can make it tough for them to keep sending, or even to communicate about it. You have no idea what’s going on for that person, so I would try to accept and move on, and not take it personally, even if this can be hard.

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Why do they quit ?

In addition to what already mentioned above, perhaps, sudden stress, sudden shock in his/ her life, overwhelmed by something on Postcrossing, and so on ?

I am sorry to hear you no longer can contact him / her…

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If I were to quit, the biggest reasons would be the high prices of stamps or the loss of interest.

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Don’t give up hope. Someday maybe you will hear from your friend again.

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I do keep that ^ in mind. That is what keeps me going.

Sometimes I feel disenchanted and think I am going to quit. I get a string of profiles that have a long want list–no mention of what they want to know about me. It seems to be all about what they want for their postcard collection. Then there is the received postcards that just say Happy Postcrossing. And then the dreaded “expired” postcards–whether they got lost or the postcrosser has quit.

Then just when I feel like I am going to stop I get some really nice profiles or sweet messages on postcards :blush:

8 Likes

I see that many other members have provided many logical reasons to answer your topic question why do people quit Postcrossing.
It is sad to lose a new connection without the other person letting you know they were quitting. Maybe it might feel like they did not value the new connection and your communication the same way you did? Honestly I would be disappointed too, if a new connection disappeared without communicating to me. But it happens. The unknown is sometimes the hardest to accept. Like others here who mention the emotional side, it is hard. I appreciate you sharing this in the forum. Reaching out to others is helpful. Take good care!

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Sure, it would have been better if a person had informed his/her penpals about quitting postcrossing.
I had a postcard penpal from another country. Once he wrote to me that due to deteriorating health he was moving to retirement home. Next day he deleted his postcrossing account.

Many people leave postcrossing because you just can’t have the same hobby for many years (ok, some people can)

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I don’t see it is strange that people leave (reasons are mentioned above by many others), but I think for this case what makes you feel so sad about it is that he/she didn’t say goodbye. This of course could be due to something really bad happening like others have said, and maybe one day he/she will come back and ready to communicate again or at least say hi to you with a quick message (like for example something happened but later on it will be solved and this person can come back or simply re-connect with a few people, or just send a one-off message).

I am that kind of person that would send a message to say hey, I cannot do this anymore - but I have not been in a situation of emergency so it might be that I wouldn’t have time or energy to communicate if something else has to take precedence.

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It’s a bit of a sad thing but my Aunty used to have lots & lots of pen pals all over the world. She suddenly passed away in 2010.

She got loads of post from people worried about her & I had to be the person to write back & let them know. It wasn’t nice. But the positive out of it is some of them kept in touch!

There’s loads of reasons. I’m sorry your friend hasn’t been in contact with you. I’m always looking for new post friends so if you want to, you can always pop me a message :slight_smile:

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