Long wishlists on profiles - what is your opinion?

When I started with Postcrossing, my profile was very short and some postcrossers ‘complained’ that they didn’t know what are my interests in cards. So I edited my profile now and then and it became longer and longer. Then there were ‘complains’ that it is tooooo long. Nowadays I have a long profile with a ‘short’ and a ‘long version’ :laughing:

About ‘tone’: My english is not really good, so I often use 2 different internet translators, but I am not sure if my ‘tone’ in german is translated in the same ‘tone’ in english.

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I like wishlists on profiles as I always try to find a suitable card. But in the end it’s just a wishlist.

Sometimes there are very specific wishes and I guess these people know, that not many postcrossers will have such cards, but maybe somebody has such a card and until now didn’t know whom to send :woman_shrugging:

I once got a profile, that only consisted of:

I want
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
I won’t register cards I don’t like.

To be honest, even if I had had one card from the wishlist (although I have 1000s of cards I hadn’t because it were very specific wishes) I think I had only sent a random viewcard.

I have albums of my collections as I know there are more people out there who are as crazy as I am and browse the collections to find the missing card, but I don’t expect that all postcrossers from the official postcrossing browse through my collections. I try to sort them as easy as possible (for example the Tausendschön-cards by PK number and the GF cards by country) so that you don’t need hours to find which one is still missing in my collection. But this is mainly for profile based RRs in the forum.

Edit: I have a very small “please don’t send”-list on my profile and recently got a card from UA that had one of these topics. The sender explained that she decided to send the card although it’s on my don’t-send-list and expressed her feelings why she felt she had to send this card in this moment. I’m fine with this as this is a very personal card and of course I appreciate all cards I receive.

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This is the sort of profile that needs to be reported. It’s so wrong for them to say this. Out of interest, did they register your postcard?

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Yes, they registered it. I also wrote on the card that they have to register all postcards and that a wishlist is just a wishlist. As far as I can remember they changed the profile, otherwise I had reported it. I think seasoned postcrossers don’t care about such demands, they know it’s just about sending any postcard. But for newbies with limited slots this could be some kind of scaring.

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Thank you everyone for your replies! It has reassured me that some people do appreciate the longer wishlists (that are not too demanding), just like I do. I was worried I was breaking some sort of universal taboo before. I know that I can never please everyone with my profile, but I at least feel like the majority will be okay with it now. P.S. if anyone has personal feedback they want to give on it then feel free to DM me :smiley:

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I always get the feeling, when they have a long wishlist, that they are more concerned about the postcard and care little that they want to know something about me or where I live. I like profiles that tell me about the person. When I can feel connected.

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Personally, I really like extensive profiles! This way I feel like I can actually send something that I know will probably make the recipient very happy. What I care little about is a page full of all kinds of statistics and goals that have been achieved. I think it’s wonderful for the person in question, but I can’t do much with it myself.

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A long “wishlist” is also a long list describing a person’s interests. As I always try to find a card the repicient might like, I appreciate when they mention their interests, no matter if in the form of a wish list or a narrative about hobbies and interests. I try to get a sense of the person for whom I’m going to choose the card. Without mentioning some interests / wishes / random facts this is very difficult.

What is REALLY difficult for me: a long list of “Don’t Sends”. Once I drew a profile with: no art, no animals, no Tausendschön, no Harenberg, no Quotes, no Self-mades, only standard size, no multi-view, no sports and so on (long list). In the end I really didn’t have a card which suited, there were too many exclusions. The few ones which would have fit in motif did not have the right format. So I just sent a random card.

Once I received a card complaining I’d have a very long list of exclusions. I only ask for not sending me nudes, war- or violence related cards and no app-generated cards. For me this is not a long list of exclusions.

About writing in English to German speaking recipients: Usually I don’t do this. But for me English is so much “the postcrossing language” that I automatically start thinking - and writing - in English when doing postcrossing. So sometimes it could have happened that I might have written a card to a German person even living in Germany - without realizing it. This does not mean I had not read the profile. Nearly all profiles are written in English, so it reinforces my tendency to go into “English mode”.

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Whislist profiles give me a “collecting, not connecting” vibe.
Connecting involves not only talking about what one wants to receive but also to express some interest in the sender.

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This does not necessarily mean that these postcrossers read a profile poorly or not at all.

It has also happened to me that I have accidentally written in English, although I have seen that the Postcrosser also understands German. But if this is the umpteenth postcard and you have written all in English before, then you are often so much in the language that you automatically continue.

Once I even wrote a card to Germany, to a German recipient, in English.

It sometimes happens to me that I write a letter to English-speaking pen pals, then my child comes to me and asks me something and I answer in English. This also happens to me with Italian.

This has nothing to do with me ignoring something or reading badly and I can well imagine that others feel the same way (respectively I even know it is).

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Do you guys feel “Please save (these themes) for others who appreciate them” is polite, or the same as Do Not Send?

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I’m fine with a list, it’s easier to read and it does help in terms of what to choose to personalize as much as possible. For example, I might have a postcard that’s ok for that person, but I might draw or write something on the back related to their wishlist, for example an animal.

Like someone else said, it really does depend on the “tone” of the entire description, some wishlists do seem like demands sometimes.

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It’s an alliteration of it, but at least shows more respect over the reader of their profile, if you understand. They’re kindly asking to avoid those it’s far different than demanding, at least I think so

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I totally understand that this may occur, it also happens to me when switching between French, German and English. But these were clearly those kind of profiles throwing out the same card with the same generic message “my name is xxx, my hobbies are xxx Happy Postcrossing” so I doubt if they even read a profile before writing a postcard. Thankfully it’s only a minority of postcrossers, most of the cards I receive have really nice and thoughtful written messages.

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This sentence really rubs me the wrong way.

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I think how this is perceived may have to do with the reader’s nationality and language. To me ‘please keep it for someone who will appreciate it’ or similar is a common term. To me it’s polite and because I’m so familiar with it I don’t deconstruct the sentence down to its literal meaning.
Looking at the sentence as a string of words however, especially if they’re translated or read literally, it doesn’t seem so polite and reads as more of a command. I recall reading a thread about this awhile back and was surprised at how offended some people were by it, but I can understand their reasoning when looking at the words.

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To me it’s nice, like they know there are persons who appreciate them, and hints these are good cards, but this person isn’t the right one :slight_smile: But yes, same-ish as do not send.

(I think I have something similar, and my intention is that I know these cards are good, just not something I like. )

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Isn’t it just the same as mentioning that the person does not appreciate certain types of cards ?

So, the sentence in question may sound polite a bit but it actually means ‘please do not send me,’ whatever the reason is ?

But still, official Postcrossing allows all people to send any types of cards to anyone.

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It always sounded quite dry and rude to me. As @lynley said, it definitely sounds as a command, but English is not my first language. It’s awesome that you raised this question because, from the other comments, I realized that it’s totally a “lost in translation” thing. :joy:

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For those of you who do not like that language, are you saying that you don’t want anything similar and that the person should just say thank you and move on? Or is there other wording that might sound better?

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