Long wishlists on profiles - what is your opinion?

“I would prefer not to receive…” sounds better to me. But, again, English is not my first language and I could be totally wrong.

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To me it’s similar to our Southern “bless your heart.” It’s a nice way to call someone stupid, but you’re still calling someone stupid.

Personally I don’t think “don’t send” lists are appropriate for official Postcrossing. You’re essentially preemptively saying you’re not going to appreciate a card, even if it’s the only card someone can send, and no matter how “nice” you say it, it’s still not a good feeling.

The only “do not” items I understand are genuine phobias.

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As @meylinhares mentioned, " I prefer not to receive certain types of cards " sounds better, but how about adding this kind of sentence in your profile, too, " But if such cards are all you have, send it to me " ? So, this way, you sound more welcoming towards cards in general, I think.

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To me it’s similar to our Southern “bless your heart.” It’s a nice way to call someone stupid, but you’re still calling someone stupid.

Interesting…
Finally I understand the joke from Young Sheldon

“when my granny says, “Bless your heart,” she means something very different”

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Out of topic, but now I need to find the young Sheldon epsiode where this phrase was said. :rofl:

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I suppose when I receive Harry Potter or Disney cards, I’ll just have to thank the person and then bin them. Surely there aren’t many members who have only those cards available?

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And this is why I like wishlists. Postcrossing is not an inexpensive hobby. Cards and stamps are not cheap, so I want to send a card that someone will (most likely) be happy to receive and not toss in the trash.

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Also, if touristic viewcards are mentioned in the wishlists, I feel so relieved as I can easily send them and also they can be most commonly available cards in many places in the world.

If touristic viewcards are not mentioned in the wishlists and if people mention of the themes I cannot send only, I feel there is a big wall built between the people and I, sadly.

When I started Postcrossing, I thought viewcards were good to send to all members, but there are actually people who dislike viewcards on Postcrossing…

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I like them for the most part as it gives me a starting point, as long as it reads like a list of suggestions rather than being a prescriptive list. The prescriptive list types seem quite intimidating for someone who doesn’t have a huge range of cards at their disposal yet, but I still do my best to find something that I think will fit.

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So how would you feel if there was a wishlist, but the person also expressed interest in the sender and wanted them to write about themselves and their area? Would that change how you felt about the wishlist? As I’ve said, I do have a long wishlist but the most important thing for me is still the message and learning about the person who is sending it.

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I don’t mind when people mention their dislikes. I just don’t like that particular wording. It sound kind of insulting to me. I expect a pat on a shoulder and a “sweet” smile after those words. You know what I mean? But based on what others said it seems it is a polite way of saying “no, thank you” and it may be lost in translation for me. :man_shrugging: To me “please don’t send / I don’t like / I am not fond of / …” are all perfectly fine ways of stating preference.

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I do have a pretty clear don’t send me in my profile: 3D cards
I have a visual disability and can’t physically see 3D cards, they are just a blurry thing of different colors that also irritates me when looking at them because I can not see a clear picture.
As I know there are beautiful 3D sunflowers out there but they are also quite expensive that would just make me feel so bad and sad if someone wastes their money for a card to me that I can not enjoy at all and most likely would throw away even if it’s the most amazing sunflower because I can’t even look at it without stressing my eyes.

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As I really struggle to choose a card without a hint (or even with only a vague hint), I’m happy about wishlists. The more precise the better. If I don’t have anything, I don’t stress out and choose something nice from my stash.

I even like to check favourites (a handful of pages, not all) to get a general idea. And I love to check (well-organised) external albums. E.g. if someone wishes for Blue Cats, they are so common. I always skip that kind of wishes if there is no album where I can check which ones are missing from my available ones, especially for users with lots of received cards :sweat_smile:

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I don’t like extremely detailed long lists, because chances are I don’t have the card you want. For example I’ve never handled a Blue Cats card in my life and don’t know where to get one. But if you do a list with general themes, I guess it’s OK.

Regardless of what your list is, if I don’t have the card you want, I do a tangent off it. For example, you want a specific Blue Cats card (and really prefer it), I don’t have that but I’ll have a cats card I can send you.

As long as you’re not demanding I can work with anything

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Ha! I collect Native American and First Nations cards so if you ever draw my name I know you will have an awesome card for me!! Somehow it mostly works out…

Thank you! I had earlier read that some people don’t like that wording at all, and couldn’t understand why, as it seems perfectly polite to me. Now I see how one can also interpret that phrase.

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Very new (early January 2023) to Postcrossing but have been free forming postcards for decades. The long and very specific lists are intimidating to read as a new sender. However, it is clear to me the recipient has given a great deal of thought to what they would like and if I can accommodate their wishes I will. As to my own profile, I do not intend to put up any sort of a wished for list. Based on my very limited exposure; I prefer to let the sender surprise me.

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If you dont have a wishlist then be sure to create a very big profile instead to help guide our selection. For example if you say you like walking your dogs on a beach, we can send dog or ocean cards. You discuss flower gardening, coffee and chocolate and many of us we can find cards in those areas to send. Feel free to expand your profile a bit more; in contrast, a totally blank profile ruins the fun for me and I just send whatever I have with very little thought.

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BAAAHAHAHA OMG :rofl::rofl:
This quote should be a postcard itself because I felt that in my soul….

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Eeww I received a profile that sounds like a replica to this… It was ridiculous! I went through his favorites to get an idea of if I had anything that he wouldn’t hate and many of his favorites were half naked or nude ladies…. I have some sexy pin up girl cards but I didn’t send one like that because all his restrictions then all the nudity just made me not like him very much at all lol.

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