Out of curiousity I checked what dictionary tells (yes, I don’t trust it)
older is told to mean similar to our “haahka”, as in aged woman, and being vulgar
(but if I would think myself, “old person” would be old, “older person”, a little younger than old, even I know it doesn’t make sense, but it would mean, older than young - but maybe this is just thought translated from my language)
Things like these show, even when one would try to use the correct word, they might choose the wrong if they follow a dictionary.
Edit.
I think the example is good, how so little thing can make the meaning worse.
And also, to understand the writer might not have a clue about such meaning.
And definitely, hopefully, no one would call this rude and ageist because of that.
Firstly, @S_Tuulia I am sorry, if I read your post correctly, that part of your joy in postcrossing was diminished when someone implied you might be rude. No one wants their character criticized, and we should not do so here.
Secondly, not seeing faces is also a reason we misunderstand each others’ tones. A reminder to be kind might help, I don’t know for sure, but I guess people are going to be grumpy occasionally and lash out inappropriately.
Thirdly, I don’t expect other people to adopt my culture just because they write in English. A great deal of the charm in participating is learning other ways of being.
Finally, concerning the word “old,” it is better to me to be more precise, for example, write the word “octogenarian” and let people decide what that means to them; however, I know from experience that that might be off putting, too. My point, again, is that some people are going to be grumpy no matter what you do. Here are some U.S. sayings: “Haters gonna hate” and “You be You,” meaning we can’t control others sometimes; don’t let them “get you down” or change your core self.
I read the reply of @S_Tuulia to @Johnk60 regarding the word old or older, and i feel it does belong here. Both of them simply explaining how the word is perceived in their own country and culture, and neither of them taking offense.
I thought that is what this topic is about?
For me, here is a perfect explanation, example, and reminder of how a simple word can appear to be the same, but actually has a much different meaning in different languages.
Now it does of course! I have no problem with anything @Johnk60 said, don’t get me wrong I tried to be meta and I feel I’m being meta again here xD
I was just thinking that the topic-starter was about this too:
and then uncalled language advice without request also might be rude for some! In some cultures publicly pointing out mistakes of someone is super embarrassing and stressful. But in many other occasions it’s not rude and many postcrossers use any opportunity to learn English better from their own and others mistakes which makes an interesting discussion like Avoiding cross-cultural faux pas, there should be a topic of ‘Avoiding linguistical faux pas’
EDIT: My input about old/older/other words discussion is that it seems words mean different things to different people even if they are native speakers. So my personal conclusion for the word usage: I would avoid using words like old/young (and many other similar) altogether to characterize people, because using this word as a characteristic describing someone is already ageism and rude imo. And using ‘old person’ or ‘redhead person’ to describe someone (not in a book, but in a dialog) seems not much of linguistical faux pas, but more of empathy/politeness failure
I would like to say that on Postcrossing guidelines, it already says to be friendly and to be polite and respectful.
While I understand I cannot judge people online at first glance, I admit that I see some or more posts by some or more people on Postcrossing are written in English by “stuck-up” and more straight-forward attitude, no matter they are native English speakers or not, which in Japan generally is a taboo in public.
Perhaps, it is normal in other cultures in the world, but I am sometimes puzzled on the forum, especially when reading in English, which is not my mother tongue.
But if there is also a line on the guideline to ask people to show understanding, I guess I will understand more.
Anyway, understanding each other on an international platform like Poscrossing is definitely needed.
I mean to me, I would try my best to write to postcrossers in their preferred language (eg French/ German). In most cases they do speak English or are comfortable reading the card in English. But in some cases they would state that their English might not be at a level high enough for them to read it, so I would use French or German to write to them instead. Improves my proficiency in the language and the other party can understand it, killing two birds with one stone.
As an American, I actually feel bad/am kind of embarrassed that it’s not common here to become fluent in at least one other language, if not more. The 2 years required in school isn’t really enough and quickly forgotten.
FWIW, I fully understand that not every Postcrosser will have strong English speaking skills. I appreciate everyone taking the time to send a postcard, and if the English isn’t perfect, that is totally fine & understandable and there will be no judgement on my behalf!!
I wish those individuals felt safe posting. They belong here just as much as English speakers.
Well said!! I’m half American and did Spanish at school (Mexican Spanish). I knew enough to get an idea of what a conversation was about but it is different to Spain’s language. Here in the UK they have to take languages in school but if you don’t use it, you lose it We just take it for granted that the rest of the world speaks English. We should try harder.
It’s sad that this has to be said. Those of us who were raised in the English language should realize how easy we have it and be tolerant of imperfections when non-English speakers communicate with us. Translations can easily appear brusque, insensitive or rude when it’s not intended. The English language is difficult enough for native speakers to keep up with, with words that were acceptable three years ago suddenly becoming offensive, insensitive or outdated, so everyone should cut some slack to those who make an effort to communicate in a language not their own. People participating in an international forum should know better.
I remember a few moments when I felt like what I wanted to convey was not properly conveyed or it seemed that many sentences contained new meanings/nuances now. When I write something like “That’s interesting", I thought that conveys its true meaning, that I genuinely interested. But I have read in another topic that it apparently sounds less enthusiastic or a bit cold? So now I use “I am intrigued” instead, whenever I remember. But then again, I think it’s okay not to think too much in a conversations. Especially in a space where we can’t see the other’s expressions and body language. The most important part is just trying to communicate and connect.
I don’t believe it is helpfull.
I do not have notes on my doors telling ‘open the door before you enter, be careful with glassdoors - and take care if you carry tablewear or glasses. You might get damaged seriously.’ Etcetera.
Because I do not need it and I believe my guests won’t need it.
If you believe it might be helpfull for others, but not for you, then it’s often not helpfull.
I think this would be more like for the situation when the door is open. When you are at home, you know what bugs might come, and what sound making ones might bite so you want to perhaps eliminate them.
Now you are in different location, with door open, some bugs come that make similar sounding noise as the biting once. But, you don’t know if they bite. Some think they do, or are sure (wrongly) and want to eliminate them. Some let them make the sound and watch what they do.
And the door is open, because you chose to (join the Postcrossing).
Ok, but hat’s not what this suggestion or topic is about.
I too do write the language I think the members knows best, if I can it too.
This suggestion is about these common areas where the language is English. And it wouldn’t be polite to write some other language suddenly. (Like I reply to Finns in English too.)
Thank you for the explanation! With my question I also wanted to show, that a formulation or abbreviation, which is common to native speakers, might be unknown to non-native speakers.
I always thought my English is not so bad, but I had no clue, what that abbreviation means, so I googled it and still had not really a clue afterwards, but @Johnk60 helped me - thank you, John! I would have understood “IMHO” for “in my humble opinion”, for that one was quite common in internet forums some years ago, but maybe even that abbreviation is not known by everyone.
but yes in fact I am as old as dirt.
I tried to be meta and I feel I’m being meta again here xD
We just take it for granted that the rest of the world speaks English. We should try harder.